So I am not a blogger and I'm definitely not a writer, but I wanted to jot down my personal experience with pregnancy for myself and for anyone that has or is going through the same thing. My pregnancy with Sylver was amazing: I got pregnant within two months off birth control and timing couldn't have been better as I only had one semester left of college. The only fork in the road or so I thought at the time; was getting Gestational Diabetes. And to be honest, I am so happy I got GD with Sylver, because it forced me to eat a clean, NON SUGAR, gluten free, diet. I had to go out of my comfort zone a lot. If anyone knows me they would probably define me as someone that loves CARBS and more CARBS. This wasn't an option anymore once I got GD, therefore, I started cooking a lot more and experimenting in the kitchen. Because of this, I now LOVE cooking and trying new recipes. Gestational Diabetes develops during pregnancy, and like other types of diabetes, GD effects how your cells use sugar (glucose). Gestational Diabetes causes high blood sugar that can effect your pregnancy and your baby's health. The risk factor of not properly staying on a diabetic diet while pregnant is major complications once your baby is born or a Still Birth. I learned to love eating a clean and healthier diet my last 4 months of pregnancy and couldn't be more grateful for that experience. Once I had Sylver the diabetes immediately went away, and everything was back to normal. I think the first thing I asked for in the hospital after Sylver was born was a BIG donut.
Once Sylver was about 16 months, Seek and I were ready to get pregnant again. Two months went by, three, four, five, six and still nothing. I couldn't help but feel bummed out and anxious, especially because I got pregnant so fast with Sylver. For any Moms out there that have had this feeling, I think you could agree that it brings a certain emotion to your life that has never entered your body. No matter how many people say, "just don't think about it", or "it will happen at the right time", or "six months isn't that long", It is so hard to NOT THINK ABOUT IT. Finally after Month Seven We got pregnant. Sylver was almost two years old and christmas was in one month. We flew to San Clemente for Christmas that year and couldn't wait to tell my family. Christmas was great, everyone was super excited and everything was going WONDERFUL. My husband had to fly home a little earlier than me to get back for work in Hawaii. Two days after he left as I was going to the bathroom I noticed a pool of blood in the toilet. I had no cramping at this time, and I felt completely healthy. Unfortunately the minute I saw the blood, I knew in my heart what was happening. I had this deep feeling within me that I had lost the baby. This is also an emotion I had never felt, never thought I would have to feel, and had actually never even thought this would happen to me. You hear about these things happening all the time especially within the first trimester of pregnancy, but I just never thought it would happen to me. Staying positive about all things has always been my goal, but this hit my like a ton of bricks. The worst part was Seek was already in Hawaii, therefore I had to tell him over the phone which is never something you want to hear while your away from your loved one/spouse. As Sylver and I flew home to Hawaii a couple days later, I had a doctors appointment scheduled. As we went into the doctors office I had this sparkle of hope that everything was okay with the baby, even though I knew in my heart what the outcome was. As the doctor came in, I felt like the two minutes he was searching for the heartbeat was a lifetime of waiting. And then to our dismay, "I'm sorry there is no heartbeat." These words were so powerful leaving my whole body almost cold. The next thing that came out of the doctors mouth was, "we will need to schedule a D&C." They wanted to give my body the opportunity to eject the baby on its own, so they scheduled it the next month. For some reason my body wouldn't let go, therefor I had to get my D&C surgery a day before Valentines Day.
Through this process I learned a number of things; One being that the Lord is an expert in timing and what is best for me, you and every single person on this earth. Secondly, moving forward to learn and become a stronger person is the best decision anyone can strive for when going through heartache or any type of tragedy for the matter. There will always be ups and downs in everyones life, some bigger issues than others, but it's what we do with those trials after, that will define who we will become. My mom gave me an amazing book to read called, "The Gift of Giving Life." It is an incredible book with some wonderful stories for all women; first time moms, moms that have experienced loss, and mothers that need guidance or spiritual up lifting. I highly recommend it.
We struggled for 9 months to get pregnant after my Surgery. At this point I started to feel like maybe I was just meant to have my Sylver; which in retrospect, I couldn't be more happy to have him in my life. He was my little miracle that made life so colorful and exciting. I guess there was a part of me that felt guilty that he wouldn't get to experience the joy of having a sibling. I always pictured myself having at least 3-5 kids all close in age. I had to change my mindset that maybe Seek and I were just meant to have one child. I decided to take one more approach in trying to get pregnant. My best friend Annie and my older sister Moranda had both seen to an acupuncturist that specialized in fertility. I found an amazing naturopathic lady in Haliewa that did acupuncture using old Chinese herb remedies. I was so nervous mostly because needles make me a bit nauseous. As I went in I couldn't believe how relaxed and soothing the entire process was. My session was an hour long, but when I woke up, it was as if I had been sleeping for fifteen hours. It was almost as if my body needed that time to let go and fall into a deep stage 4 of sleep and rest. I went to two sessions with her, two weeks apart. After the second session I was pregnant.
Our baby girl is due January 3rd. I am almost 25 weeks and I feel amazing. Sylver was born December 28th 2012, which will make them almost exactly 4 years apart. This pregnancy has been much different compared to Sylver's. As I mentioned earlier, other than getting GD, everything was smooth sailing with my first pregnancy. I was never sick with him, of course unless I was hungry or 'Hangry.' This current pregnancy I felt awful the first three months. I felt so worthless, lazy, nauseous (even though I never threw up), and completely incapable. After my first trimester the sickness went away and everything has been wonderful ever since. One scare in the first trimester was I had frequent 'light' bleeding off and on. Of course this worried me because of my previous miscarriage. I then went back to see the acupuncturist, and ever since that visit to her, I haven't had any bleeding. I am a huge believer in faith, moving forward in a positive way, and allowing others around you to inspire and direct you on the right path. For me, I truly believe that my body needed the acupuncture care in order to reset my body. I believe that timing is everything, and I know through patience, love, and determination, blessings will come our way. Everyone has a plan mapped out for them. It's up to us to be in tune in taking the right steps on achieving success and happiness.
Me. Seek, and Sylver couldn't be more excited about this baby girl! Thank you for everyone that has inspired and talked with me along the way. Being a friend to someone can be one of the most powerful things, and a light in more ways that you know. I am so lucky to have my husband in my life that is a constant example of faith and living in the moment. Taking a minute to sit back and be grateful for what we DO HAVE, is always something to ponder about.
On a completely different subject; I feel like raising a girl will be WAYY different than a BOY! I think I'll need HELPPPP. Any girl advice would be greatly appreciated! haha.